Pain in Nick's Ass - MRI and Where the sun don't shine III

So, back in April I finally had a follow-up appointment with my new oncologist. She was uncomfortable going another six months till another CT scan. I told her I was uncomfortable getting more radiation. So we negotiated to an MRI. An MRI takes longer, costs more, and doesn't do a good job looking at the lungs, but does a better job looking at the soft tissues surrounding the area where my primary tumor was and is better at looking at the liver (prime spot for Colorectal cancer metastases). Pros and cons, just like everything in life.

I scheduled an MRI for the middle of June and the day before put a reminder into the oncologists office that I'd like a call when the results come in, to which they replied I'd get a call. The MRI is with contrast, so when I get to the imaging center they started an IV which goes off without a hitch.

***Side Note: I've gotten a bit pickier in my old age regarding customer service and dealing with organizations the size of Stanford has it's pluses and minuses. Let's take the IV placement for example. Every time I get stuck the nurse assumes it's my first rodeo. How about you take a peak at me medical record, see that this isn't my first rodeo, my second, or my 10th. All I ask is for a little bit of personalized service. "I see that this scan is for a colorectal cancer surveillance, I'm sure you've had an IV or two started do you have any preferences where I go..." See that's simple. I get it, some people are very sensitive to their health information and it could be a HIPPA thing, but I'm pretty sure they know why I'm there. There probably also some thinking of ,'I must say the same thing every time otherwise I may miss something.' So patients get treated like they're a number. Oh well. I suppose there's bigger fish to fry.***

The scan takes about an hour in a tube not much wider than my shoulders. I can see how some people have issues with MRIs. You're stuck in a tube for a while with the machine thumping, clicking, banging around you. If you don't know what's going to happen it's probably disconcerting.

So the scan is done and I wait for the call which never comes. A couple days go by and I ask for the report. To which the reply is:

"Your CT results are up but we usually don't release them to myhealth until the dr sees them and [the] Dr is out of the office until Tuesday. I can tell you there is no evidence of tumor reoccurrence." 

OK. So, I had an MRI...does that mean you misspoke and your were looking at my MRI results or did you look my last CT scan (8 months ago for which I already have the report). So, being a 'details' guy  I don't know how to feel about the last sentence. In the end I prefer to read the reports myself. I wait a couple days after my Doc get's back in town (You know a polite thing to due as I'm sure there's more pressing things) and I still haven't gotten the report to send my next message. To which I get the following repy:

"Hi, the MRI will be discussed at your appointment but like your CT there is no evidence of tumor reoccurrence."

Again with the CT...Dude I haven't had a CT scan for 8 months why are we talking about it? Oh and my next appointment isn't until the end of September and I'm not waiting that long. So, it's July 1st, 15 days post scan I still haven't seen the report. I think smoke may have been coming out of my ears when I read that response. I went from supposedly getting a call with the results, to getting the report released when the doc got back to town, to having to wait till September. I didn't reply. Now about that customer service...

The next weekend was 4th of July and we spent it with my old oncologist and his family. We had a great time. His daughter and Ollie got along fabulously. I wasn't planning on saying anything because he's not my doctor anymore, but it got brought it up one evening. So, he grabbed his computer pulled the MRI report up and e-mailed it to me (turns out he has access to all of his old patients records).

No definitive evidence of tumor recurrence. No evidence of lymphadenopathy or metastatic disease within the abdomen or pelvis.

Sweet, I finally place eyes on the report 17 days post MRI. But, there's still some unfinished business. My old oncologist is not my current provider he's not the person I mail thousands of dollars to for service. If this is how the new oncologist is going to roll I'm not interested in seeing her.

38 days post MRI I send a message via the Stanford messaging system to my Doc. It was initially a bit of a flame-o-gram, but I decided to tone it down. I did include many of the quotes above. I'm pretty sure it was intercepted by the nurse who wrote the responses, but the report was released minutes later. So, now I get to have a fun conversation with my doc about the whole conversation, because I'm pretty sure she knows nothing of it (which is sort of a problem in itself). I'm just not interested in dealing with a similar situation in the future and will go find another doc to follow up with if necessary.

So, on to my colonoscopy. Last Thursday I did my prep and Friday was show time. The prep went smooth I added one little thing to it. Vaseline on the 'exit' prior to the commencement of evacuation and between each evacuation. It's basically protects the skin from irritation during the bowel movement and it worked. This prep was decidedly less 'spicy' than last time.

On Friday Lindsey and I went to Stanford a bit early to pic up a CD of the MRI, then went down to endoscopy. After another bad IV stick (couldn't get the first one to flow, so they stuck me again) and about an hour delay (only medical procedure that goes on time is the first one and sometimes not even that one) I get wheeled back get a camera shoved where the sun does shine. Like the last one I woke up just before they were done. I could see the screen and noticed the anastomosis (where the surgeon plugged my colon back together) and I confirmed it with the doc. Yes, I was talking to him while there was a camera in me.

After I was wheeled to recovery I took a little nap got my clothes on and chatted with the doc. He didn't find anything. So, it only took 5 colonoscopies in 3 years to finally not have them find something (the last two they found non-cancerous polyps they clipped). Awesome. Now I have the decision on whether to do another next year or wait two years. I'm leaning towards doing it again next year. Better safe than sorry and I'm getting really good at the prep. I would definitely make the all-star team...if there was one.

Back to the MRI. Since I work in spine I was really curious to see the condition of my lumbar discs. Below is an image of my Lumbar Spine:

My Lumbar Spine

The arrows show my healthy discs. The have good height and the lightness in the
 disc show it's properly hydrated, bad discs start turning black.

I'm going to leave any fertility discussion for another post, maybe. But, in a nutshell it's not going good. It's likely I'm permanently sterile and we're not having a good time with IVF.

I've got a CT scan and follow-up with my doc in the fall. Where I get to have a fun conversation with her about the whole results thing. Oh well at least my spine looks good.

Cancer the gift that keeps giving.